When couples come to see a therapist, they usually come because they are stuck in a negative pattern that has taken over their relationship. Or they come because of years of pain, hurt or unfaithfulness.
They have tried to communicate but, instead, find themselves descending into a spiral of blaming and defensiveness. This pattern is called “the dance” or “the cycle”: the infinity loop that leaves them feeling disconnected from one another, alone, and helpless. Here at Cherry Hill counseling we have many highly qualified therapist trained to help you at this time in your relationship.
Attachment distress is caused when we cannot connect with our partner. When caught in a web of miscommunication and blame, and feeling hurt and helpless, it is easy to wonder if your partner even cares. This negative dance of push-pull cannot be solved by logical problem solving. This is a result of the fight or flight part of the brain taking over, simultaneously bypassing logical thought. A Cherry Hill Therapist can help improve attachment in your relationship through Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy.
When you stop listening to your partner, distance is the outcome. It sends a message that you don’t care. At the core of relationships is knowing you partner cares. At the heart of loving someone is listening to understand a situation from your partners point of view. Asking open ended questions, “like tell me more?” or “help me understand?” lead to better communication. You do not need to stay stuck in a negative pattern or in pain and suffering. A trained couples therapist can help you improve communication and identify your attachment distress. Here at Cherry Hill Counseling we have many qualified therapists trained to help you.